The Good Death

Death is a strange and morbid topic. At least, many consider it to be so. Myself, I think about dying almost every day. It comes with my vocation. I know many people, and because of this, I go to many funerals. Everyone dies. You will die. I am going to die. I think about this every time I speak at a funeral or simply attend the funeral of an acquaintance or a loved one.

I have never been to a funeral where the actual death of the person is not discussed. It would be absurd if it weren't. Sometimes, it is quietly discussed when the means of death is dishonorable. Yet, hushed or open, the means of death is discussed. It does not matter if it is suicide or cancer, accident or old age, sudden or foreseen. The manner of death is always discussed. Quite often, this is followed by a judgment on whether or not this is a good way to go, and personal preferences on the method of death are discussed. The general consensus seems to be that most people want to die suddenly with as little foresight as possible. Dropping dead instantly of a heart attack or dying in one's sleep is the means of choice.

I do not want to go out like that, though I confess I have no choice in the matter. I hope that I have a window of time that I might see the approach of the inevitable. I would like, if at all possible, a time of reflection before I die. After all, I am spending every day of my life preparing for my demise. Dying will be a big day for me. I do not look at death as a dread, though I admit I do not look forward to the pain involved, I do not dread the actual being dead part.

You may find me hopelessly morbid, but I do daydream about dying from time to time. There are several constants in my daydream. My wife is always there, because I hope that she will outlive me. This is very important to me because when I die, I want to die faithful to her. I want her to be there without regret, and I want the vows that bound us so many years before to be more meaningful and beautiful on that day than on the day we made them. I want for her to feel and know that she has been loved. I want her to know that each day I had with her has been to me the highest of all of my privileges here in this life.

My children are also there. Every day, I pray that my heavenly Father will make me a good father to my children, that they will know that I love them, and that they will feel treasured by me. I want them to know that being their father has been the highest privilege I have had in this life.

This may cause the reader a bit of confusion since I just wrote that I want my wife to know that being her husband has been my greatest privilege. Reflection upon death and life and love has led me to realize many things that confuse others but do not bother me in the slightest. I believe in a Triune God who is One Being in Three Persons. I adore each person of the Trinity as the only True God. It is no great stretch for me to suppose then that I have more than one greatest privilege in life. I love more than one person "the most". I cannot divide the substance of the love I have for my wife and my children and my friends, it is the same and yet different. Perhaps I cannot explain this to anyone else in a way that will satisfy, but in my heart I know the truth of it.

This brings me to another constant: my friends. I have some friends that I have known and loved for most of my life. May they all outlive me and exceed me! In my dreams, they are there as well. They are there in my deathly daydream because they will know that I have loved them and they have loved me for it. They will be there because they will know that I have counted their friendship as the highest privilege in my life here.

My daydream ends with me surrounded by those who I have loved so much that they cannot deny that they have been loved by me. This is what it means for me to live each day as if it would be my last. If I could only die this way, then I could fly to my Savior unashamed. He is the one who bound me to all of these by the cords of love, and this is the only and greatest burden that He ever put on me as his servant. He has commanded me to love, and he is teaching me to do it. I hope that I will be found faithful until that day comes, and I pray that I will live each day with dying in mind so that I might live well until I do.

The Sweet Death

I was stillborn. I was dead and yet still dying. I was dead to love. I was unfeeling. My death throes sent me grabbing for any sliver of pleasure I thought might hold me up, but I sank down in the dark with fists that could not hold the happiness for which I longed.

I was born blind. Slivers of light would dart across my eyes, but I could not tell from where they had come or where they went. So, I cursed my darkness and swelled with hate.

I was born ignorant. My thoughts could not grasp the truth, and I raged that there was none to be had. No food for my starving mind, only ceaseless thoughts that could not satisfy my famished, dead, and dying soul.

I could not taste. All of life soon became bland, even the sweet pleasures I stole became tasteless in my mouth. I wasted because I could find no savory food.

And then I saw you, my God. You offered me your body, and so I took it. I ate your flesh and drank your blood. I felt and tasted your love between my teeth. I saw the truth of my death and my life in your death and life. I put my hands in yours and felt the nails pierce my skin. At last, my misery died there with you in your embrace, and so I finally began to live.

The Real and Reasonable Darkness in Harry Potter

I am a bit ashamed when Christians get bent out of shape over the magic of Harry Potter. It demonstrates a lack of critical thinking, a Luddite approach to the arts, and a very valuable missed opportunity to engage with culture in a meaningful way. If anyone reads the Harry Potter series and comes away thinking that the main point is spell-casting and the making of witches, then they simply fail to grasp the point of the series. The themes in Harry Potter are much deeper than wand waving and wizardry.

Truly, the heaviest theme in the series is not witchcraft, it is the exploration of death and dying. I would make the argument that death is the central theme of the Harry Potter series. How the main characters deal with death essentially defines who they will be as a person. Death, in one way or another, profoundly shapes Harry Potter, Voldemort, and even Severus Snape. The reason that Voldemort has any followers is that he has promised them immortality. They are the "Death Eaters," the ones who will escape death.

This is precisely why the "darkness" in Harry Potter grows as Harry grows and as the series continues. As a child, Harry is haunted by the murder of his parents. But because he is a child, death still seems a far off notion, the world of the living and the world of magic are what fascinate Harry. Harry is innocent, and though he has had to deal with the spectre of death his entire life, "The Boy Who Lived" is still just a boy at the outset.

As the story progresses, Harry has to cope with more and more death because, as I mentioned before, Voldemort is really, really evil. Harry not only has to deal with the murder of his parents, but by the end of the series he has had to deal with the death of his beloved "adoptive" father Sirius Black, he sees his friend Cedric Diggory murdered before his eyes, Mad-Eye Moody is slain, his pet owl Hedwig is killed, and his faithful servant Dobby the Elf is also killed by an evil witch. All of these deaths are tragic, but noble. Harry's friends my die, but they all do so acting quite bravely, each one dying in defense of Harry himself.

Ghosts first clue us in to this struggle with death. Ghosts are funny things, a sort of darkly humorous side item that appears in the series. "Nearly Headless Nick", who is played by John Cleese in the movies, is especially funny. When Harry's father figure, Sirius Black, is slain in battle with Death Eaters, Harry is hopeful that Sirius will return as a ghost. He speaks to Nearly-Headless Nick about it, but Nick tells him that Sirius will never be a ghost. Ghosts are people who died but were afraid to "cross over." Ghosts, then, are rather pathetic creatures in this light. They are those who are unliving, longing to live as they once did, but unable to embrace the fact that they never will.

Another magnificent scene in the series is when Harry gets into the carriage that takes the students to Hogwarts the year after he sees Cedric Diggory die. Up until that year, Harry, along with most of the students, believes that the carriages are drawn by magic. This time, Harry sees that the carriages are really drawn by red-eyed, leathery winged horse creatures. His friend Luna Lovegood informs him that these are "Thestrals" and that only those who have "seen death" can see Thestrals. This is a wonderful bit of writing. It symbolizes how Harry's eyes are being opened to the reality of death. Harry's battle, in the end, is not really against Voldemort. Voldemort is really more pitiful than a ghost. Harry's battle is with death, and once Harry faces the fear of death, and recognizes the fact that he must indeed die, then he is free from all the threats of Voldemort.

So if one wishes to be critical of Harry Potter, I hope that they will not do it because he waves a wand and shouts Latin"ish" phrases. Be critical because of how the series explores death, friendship, love, and bravery. I believe, if a Christian or anyone else, will judge the books on those merits, Harry Potter will come out a winner every time. The growing darkness of Harry Potter is not due to Mrs. Rowling's turn to the darkside. The growing darkness is because as Harry becomes aware of the reality of evil and death as he matures, so does the reader. It is a natural progression, not an increase of wickedness. Like Thestrals, the darkness was always there, you just couldn't see it before.

The Clarity that Only Death Can Bring

Man who is born of a woman is few of days and full of trouble. He comes out like a flower and withers; he flees like a shadow and continues not...Since his days are determined, and the number of his months is with you, and you have appointed his limits that he cannot pass (Job 14:1-2, 5).

Death is just around the bend for all of us. Perhaps today, I will meet my appointed time to stand before my Maker. Perhaps, even as I write this, a cancer is growing inside of me that will claim my life, or maybe an artery in my heart has ballooned in an aneurysm to burst at any moment. Maybe, as I sit and sip my coffee, and mad man is on his way to this very store to send me to the judgment seat in a hail of gunfire. One thing is certain, whether it is today, tomorrow, or many years from now, a course of events is shaping up to send me to my long home. I am a dying man in a decaying world.

Do you think it morbid to think such thoughts? I do not. I think, in some ways, that they are very healthy. Death, my final foe, is circling me even now, threatening to take away all that I hold dear in this world. He is stalking my children, my wife, and my friends. And he will have them, one by one, until they are no more on this earth. He is brutal, thorough, and relentless. I will face him, as will you, and you must be ready for the battle of your life.

Does this certainty make you despair? Will you say with MacBeth:

Out, out, brief candle! Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player That struts and frets his hour upon the stage And then is heard no more: it is a tale Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, Signifying nothing..

Is that all life is? A tale told by an idiot? A raving, maniacal thing that ends in vain? When MacBeth looked into the eyes of death he saw only the vanity of life. He saw no hope. No meaning. Only despair.

Believers in the Lord Jesus Christ should not have such a bleak outlook. We are called to consider ourselves dead to ourselves (Rom. 6:11). Jesus taught that only by dying to ourselves will we ever truly live (Luke 9:24). So death, in some form, is an ever present reality to Christians that we must embrace in order to live. Death, then, in all of its wrongness, becomes a servant to usher us into eternal life.

Each day, a follower of the Lord Jesus should face death. In so doing, we receive greater clarity about what it is to live, about what is important. First, we must die today by putting to death sin in the form of selfish, godless desires. We do this by valuing Christ Jesus more than life and sin. Secondly, we are to consider our days and that death is stalking us. By so doing, we will be able to disarm his threatenings by letting go of all that we cannot keep in order to hold the things we cannot lose. What can death not steal? Our standing in Christ, our love for the world by the Holy Spirit, and our works which are sown in righteousness. We should concentrate on these things and thinking on death helps us to keep them in perspective. Perhaps, if we fight well, we will meet death with hope, knowing that a better ressurection is coming, and that all loss for Christ's sake is gain.

A Date With Death

I'm going to die. The only thing that could possibly prevent such a fate is the return of the Lord Jesus, and I have no idea if that will happen. I will have to meet death like everyone before me, and it is likely that it will test me like no other trial I have ever endured.

I firmly believe that the date, time, and means of my death are firmly fixed on God's calendar. I cannot alter it one moment, nor would I if I could. I will die precisely when God means me to, and it will be at the perfect time for me and all who love God. I believe that God causes all things to work together for the good of those who love Him, don't you?

In the meantime, I am jogging to stay healthy. In the near future, I hope to expand my exercise regiment to work on other muscle groups. I do not do this stave off the inevitable encroachment of death. I do it, to paraphrase Jonathan Edwards, "to live with all my might while I yet live." If I die skinny and otherwise healthy at 35 of a massive heart attack, it is better than dying fat and unhealthy at 35 of a massive heart attack. It is good because I will have died a good steward of the only body I've been in, and I believe that pleases the Lord. Living is not the opposite of dying; there is more to life than a pulse and brain waves and unclogged arteries.

I live every day with an eye on death, my final foe. I once had a friend who speculated on what would be the best day of his life outside of the day he was saved. He thought it might be the day he met his wife, or his wedding day, or perhaps the birth of a child. He asked me what I thought. I said, "I am living so that the day that I die will be the greatest day of my life." He looked puzzled. I said, "In that moment when death comes, if life truly flashes before our eyes, then I want to look back and remember the day that I met my wife and remember that I treated her with integrity. I want to remember my wedding day and every day after and know that I loved her as closely as I could to how Christ loves His church. I want to remember my children and that I raised them to know Christ, and that I shared my joy in His love at their rising up and when we walked in the way and when they went to bed. I want to know, as I lay dying, that nothing I did in my life ever contradicted my love for the Savior. If that is the case, then that will truly be the greatest day of my life."

Death is an enemy and an old foe. I believe it was John Piper who said that the power of death lies in his ability to take away all that we hold dear. He steals our dreams, our loved ones, and all our hopes in this life. So we recoil at him and hate him because he would rob us of all earthly treasure. The way to conquer is to know all the threats and power of the enemy, Certainly, he is coming to take all that we hold dear in this life, and he is an unstoppable foe. He cannot be beaten by diet and exercise, nor can he be bribed by riches. He will not spare the young or the old or the innocent. Yet, the Christian may triumph because when he comes, we hold one thing to be more dear than anything this world holds, something so precious that when death comes, we count that day gain. In that moment, our enemy will usher us into the presence of the King. It is gain to be with the King! That is where are heart is and that is where our true treasure lies. Death has lost his sting and the grave has no victory, for in Christ is eternal life, and in His presence is the fullness of joy and at His right hand are pleasures forevermore. John Piper helped me see this, as have many of God's other magnificent conquerors.

I am resolved with Jonathan Edwards to live with all of my might while I yet live. I am resolved to meet death with a clear conscience and with an eye that looks over his shoulder to see a risen Lord. Death has a destiny as well. His cruelty is coming to an end. "For as in Adam all die, so in Christ all will be made alive...Then the end will come, when he hands over the kingdom to God the Father after he has destroyed all dominion, authority and power. For he must reign until he has put all his enemies under his feet. The last enemy to be destroyed is death" (1 Cor. 15:22, 24-26). May the grant us the faith to overcome this last and great foe, and may we so train ourselves in God's Word and be so entranced with His gospel that even our dying will be full of grace and utterly victorious.

The Foolishness of the Gospel

I recently had another one of those funerals where I knew no person involved. I was called because one of the family members contacted a friend about a minister to do the service, and that friend contacted me. I had never even met the friend, she knew me only by reputation. They asked me to come, and I went.

The family was rather nice, and they seemed well-educated and pretty cultured. They were polite with me, and they thanked me for coming. They gave me the order of service. I was to open with prayer and then lead the family and friends in the Lord's Prayer. At the close of the service, I was to give a devotional thought and close with the 23rd Psalm. After this was explained and I had offered condolences to the family, one of the family members spoke up and said something to the effect of, "Now, we don't need a sermon pastor, or some speech on, 'Repent or else!' Just something nice. I'm sure you know what you're doing." The family laughed in agreement. They wanted no sermon and no message on repentance.

I was oddly stunned. I was called at the last minute, and I had planned on speaking from Ecclesiastes 12 and the vanity of clinging to this life without regard to God. I felt as if the rug had been pulled from under me because I knew that if you take away sermons and messages on eternal life and repentance and hell and heaven, I'm just a guy in a suit. The janitor would have had more things to say than me, and he wouldn't have had to drive as far to say them.

So I went in the back and I prayed. I did not speak on Ecclesiastes 12. Instead, I chose 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18, which is all about the resurrection from the dead and the glorious appearing of our Lord. I did the opening condolence, recited the Lord's Prayer, and sat and waited in growing discomfort.

The family gave the eulogy. One read a poem about how the deceased had not really died but simply had become one with nature. She was now a bird and the wind and the grass and the water. She was everywhere and always with them. The family wept; I fidgeted.

My part came soon, and I took my Bible and stood behind the lectern. The family waited, and I struggled. I knew that what I was about to say would probably offend, but that is not what bothered me. I felt deeply, for perhaps the first time, the foolishness of the gospel. I don't know why it struck me so deeply at that moment, but it did. As I was turning to 1 Thessalonians, the thought in my head was, "I am about to tell these people that a Jewish man some 2000 years ago died and came back to life. And if that weren't enough, I am about to tell them that this same man is going to appear in the sky and that when He does, He will teleport people into the air to hover with Him there." Internally, I chuckled to myself. How absurd I was about to sound to these people!

So I preached, contrary to the request that was made. I did not raise my voice or yell, I simply presented the hope of the gospel in all of its glory and foolishness, and I told them that I believed it with all of my heart. I came to give hope to those who mourn, but more importantly, I came to give honor to the One who is Sovereign over life and death. That is why I disregarded the request, and that is why I always will.

Next time, I will be better prepared for such a circumstance. If someone says something like that, I will simply say something like, "Sir, I am servant of Jesus Christ, not a hired professional. I must say what I must say, and if that is disagreeable to you, then I will leave. But I promise you this, what I say will be sweet because repentance and salvation is sweet, though not everyone finds such truth palatable."

The gospel is foolishness to those who are perishing, and I am a fool for Christ's sake. May the Lord bless the gospel that was not wanted but was given, and may they come to see a likely offense as a tender mercy. Amen.